Sorry, Comcast Representative! – My Experience Learning to be Kinder

November 20, 2014 by Priyanka Leave a Comment

My Internet suddenly stopped working. I work from home, so I had to make sure the Internet was up and running. I picked up the phone and immediately called Comcast. Eventually, a Comcast Representative came to the line and spoke to me.

Be Kind and Compassionate

I told Her I Needed My Internet to be Connected and Running

A young woman probably in her twenties or thirties asked me questions about my Internet. This had happened before, and usually the representative resolved the matter within a minute or two. They simply reset the router and voila the Internet was working perfectly again.

Well, this time it wasn’t so simple.

She was brand new to her job. It was obvious she was still in training mode. She asked me detailed questions that didn’t make total sense to me. I answered her questions, but after a point, I started becoming irritated. I just wanted my Internet to freaking work!!

I started to become impatient and my tone took on a harsher tone. She sensed it and tried her best to resolve the matter as quickly as possible.

But Guilt Arose in my Heart…

One of my past work experiences floated to my mind at that moment. I remember learning something brand new and trying to do my best while talking to candidates for the first time. Some candidates were not nice to me and I could tell by their tone, they were thinking: “Can this girl just hurry up and ask me the right questions?”

But how would I learn until I didn’t make mistakes? Practice makes perfect. I remember that I wanted the candidates to be more compassionate towards me. And now I was behaving in the same insensitive manner towards this girl.

Why Couldn’t I be Compassionate Towards Her?

The Internet started working and I thanked her for her work. My voice softened. I was gentler towards her. I was more compassionate. After all, we all go through such experiences. I went through it myself when I first started recruiting. After the call, the survey line called me and I gave her all ten out of tens!

What has been your experience in being kinder? Please share with me in the comments.

Trusting and Forgiving Again After Going Through a Challenging Experience

November 15, 2014 by Priyanka 3 Comments

Sometimes, life throws you an experience you would never have imagined even in your dreams. This can be a magical experience. But what if the opposite happens? What if something so shocking and traumatic happens that you can’t even fathom it’s a reality?

Forgiving and Trusting Again

My Family’s Experience with Selling Our Business – Ouch

In another post, perhaps I’ll share the details, but after my father had a stroke, my family decided to sell our small business, but instead the unspeakable happened. In December 2012, the deal did not happen and further more, my father was taken advantage by the buyers and our business was snatched away through manipulation. My father had invested most of his retirement savings in the business and we didn’t get anything in return. But more than that, the smiles of my parents’ faces were not there.

How Do You Trust Again after a Painful Experience?

I had a hard time trusting anyone after this experience. For almost two years, I couldn’t get over what happened. I became bitter and over analyzed any person’s remark or action.

It was not until much later, I realized I was living my life walking on eggshells. I was always looking over my shoulder.

Rediscover Joy and Happiness Through Forgiveness

I worked on letting go of the pain that came because of this experience. I started to write affirmations and say them out loud in forgiving the couple associated with manipulating my father.

I went deeper than that. I thought about every single person in my life and let them go in my mind. I also asked for forgiveness for things I may have done to others.

That couple was not even a part of our lives anymore, but the energetic ties were affecting my life. By forgiving, I cut off our energetic ties and released them from my life lovingly. But note that though I was not accepting their actions, I was forgiving what happened to us.

The trust part is not so easy, but I realized there are many beautiful human beings with integrity in this world. If I were to be happy in my life again, I had to trust again. It was the only way to find meaning in my life and relationships.

How did you start trusting and forgiving again after a challenging experience? What was your biggest takeaway from this post? Please share with me in the comments.

Put in the Work and Detach from the Outcome

November 13, 2014 by Priyanka Leave a Comment

I witness this often among my friends. They develop courage to take a step even when they have a fear of the unknown. And when they do what they desire, they spend the time afterwards obsessing over the outcome.

Detach from Outcome for Manifesting Desires

Being a creative person, I have practiced the act of detachment often. During the process of signing with my literary agent, I had to practice detachment this year!

Detachment is the Key to Manifesting Your Desires

Most people have a general idea about the power of attraction and manifesting desires, but they slip up when it come to the detachment portion.

When you want a desire or outcome to materialize, you put in the work. Since you’re a child, you’re told you can’t sit on your couch, be lazy, and expect things to magically happen.

What Do You Do After You Put in the Work?

Stop thinking about it! Let go of the outcome. Think about when you plant a seed to grow into a beautiful plant: You work is planting the seed, watering the plant, and letting the sun shine over the plant.

What do you do after that? You step away and let the planet grow. No matter how many times you run back into your garden and stare at the seed inside the ground, it’s not going to grow. Just because you can’t see what’s happening underneath the soil, does not mean growth is not occurring.

You have to let the plant organically grow and take on its own process. Your desires are the same way. You have to back away to let the magic happen!

Let Go of the Outcome and Feel Peace Instead

Once you’ve put in the work, feel a sense of peace. When you’ve done your best, TRUST that the Universe will bring your desire to manifestation at the perfect time. If it doesn’t happen the way you wish it, then trust that there is a reason for that, too. Trust, trust, and trust the process!!

What is your biggest takeaway from this post? Please share with me in the comments!

When I told a Guy I Liked Him in College – My Experience

November 10, 2014 by Priyanka 3 Comments

I don’t think I have ever talked about this experience so openly and fully. But I feel it is the perfect time to reveal this experience. It happened seven years ago in college, yet it remains imprinted in my mind.

Liking a Guy

A Guy I was in Love With

I was a Resident Advisor in my last year of college. The guy I liked was a resident, though not part of my building! He was a resident of my team member’s building and a part of the transfer student building specifically.

He was tall, rugged looking, dirty blond, and had the most gorgeous, sparkling blue eyes.

Sigh! Even Today, I can Feel that Electrifying Feeling

He wasn’t the most good looking guy, but there was something very striking about him. He definitely had an aura.

Immediately, I fell for him. At the time, I was working out like crazy and trying to shed off the pounds I had piled on in high school. That was the year I was regaining my confidence and feeling good about myself.

I Couldn’t Stop Thinking About Him and Confessed My Feelings to Him…

All I could think about was him. I genuinely liked him a lot, but was incredibly shy around him. But as the school year wrapped up and I knew I was graduating and would move on, I felt compelled to tell him my feelings.

At first, I couldn’t do it. I waved it off. But I couldn’t sleep and that thought just kept swirling in my head. One day, I ran into him in the night as as I was walking to another resident building. There was no around him and no one was with me. This was my moment.

It was the Perfect Time

With a shaky voice and an extremely red face, I told him that I had a major crush on him and liked him with all my heart. He grinned and also turned red. Then, in a low voice, he told me he had a girlfriend!

My Heart Sank

It was the most exhilarating and intense experience in my life up until that point. I felt free to express my feelings to him, but as soon as he told me he had a girlfriend, my heart sank.

Later, perhaps due to immaturity with us both being young, he started to avoid me and I could tell the way his friends looked at me at the dining commons and chuckled, I knew that they knew about my confession. I felt embarrassed. He even blocked me on Facebook and I became confused and sad because I never said anything to him after our run in. I had decided to leave him alone considering he had a girlfriend.

I wanted to complete my last year of college with my dignity intact. One early morning after a rigorous gym workout, I saw him with his girlfriend sharing breakfast and being loving. My heart broke into many pieces.

Today, I realized How Much Courage it Took Me

This experience cracked my heart open. It was my very first time dipping my foot in the love and romance water. I took a chance even though it didn’t turn out the way I wanted. I put myself on the spot. It took me a year to get over that experience. But looking back, I realize how much I grew as a person since then. Today, I could share this experience, but if I hadn’t done it, I would have kept wondering what would have happened… Sometimes, it’s better to know 🙂

What are your thoughts on this post? Please share with me in the comments.

Gerard Butler Quote – How Much Pain is Sitting in You?

November 9, 2014 by Priyanka Leave a Comment

“That emotion showed me how much pain can sit in this body of yours; pain and sorrow that you don’t know you have until it is unleashed.” – Gerard Butler

Gerard Butler’s parents had divorced when he was very young. He never heard or saw his father for a long time. Until when he was sixteen years old, he met his father again at a restaurant in Scotland. After the meeting, he said how the tears wouldn’t stop and he came to the profound realization about how much pain can be inside us and we may not even realize it until something triggers it.

Gerard Butler: Losing his Father

Releasing Your Pain and Fears

I have been very fortunate in many areas of my life. But even I sometimes have realized how much hurt has been inside me until some situation or moment triggered the pain in me. I had a moment like this recently and I couldn’t stop crying.

I have seen this in people close to me as well. One particular experience comes to mind. I remember dating a guy and never knowing he had a twin brother. Until his birthday came and I wanted to celebrate the day in a fun and grand way with him.

I Noticed He Became Sad and Lost

He kept avoiding celebrating his day. I thought maybe it was something to do with work or another normal matter. We went to the restaurant and ordered our drinks, he then told me with a shaky voice about his twin brother being no more due to an electrical incident in India decade ago.

I comforted him the best I could and then I instantly understood why he spoke very little of his family and seemed to be emotionally distant. He was holding so much within. For reasons best known to us, we don’t date anymore, but I did tell him to deal with the pain buried deep inside his heart. We all have some pain or fear deep inside us and it’s important to confront it so we can be happy and have peace of mind. This allows you to feel real intimacy with yourself and with someone else.

Have you felt this way? What are your thoughts on this experience? Please share with me in the comments.

Priyanka Yadvendu

Answers to Joy, Intimacy, Security, Family & Romantic Relationships for 20-Something Women